Can you remember that song Shaddap You Face? A fine example of musical creativity, yes? No! But nonetheless this dubious song made it to number one in the UK singles chart, didn't it, keeping at number two a beautiful piece of musical genius highly deserved of the top spot, namely Vienna by Ultravox. It's an absolute travesty but, bitterness aside, my reason for bringing this up is to illustrate the point that, contrary to what we're led to believe, we do NOT have to be exceptional at what we do to achieve our goals. And it's not about who we know either - it's about deciding what we want, believing in it and taking opportunities, and that's all.
If you want to achieve something, here's what you need to do:
Step 1) Decide.
The hardest part of getting what you want is deciding what you want. Don't limit yourself to what you think you can easily achieve - if your heart's in it you'll find the way. Then say it out loud, "I will move to Austria and join the opera!" Say it often and write it down. Tell people you plan to move to Austria and join the opera. As well as opening doors this will ensure that when the relevant opportunities present themselves you'll recognise them.
Step 2) Believe.
The second hardest part of getting what you want is believing you can have it. We all equally deserve to realise our dreams - keep reminding yourself of this. "I can and I will move to Austria and join the opera - heck, I deserve it!" Don't worry about how you'll achieve it, that will never be a problem, just believe in it. This will ensure that, when you recognise the aforementioned opportunities you don't just ignore them.
Step 3) Take.
The most straightforward step is simply to seize the opportunities. You don't need to be good at or have experience of your goal (do you think Joe Dolce was especially talented?!) because what you need will appear when you need it. People who've moved to Austria and joined the opera will fall out of the woodwork keen to offer advice. Well-wishers will help you. You'll be bombarded with useful articles, classes, videos, magazines... Take hold of every opportunity toward your goal that, in your heart, feels right.
There's no step 4 - that's all, folks! Follow the three steps above and you WILL manifest your goal - Ohhh, Viennaaa..!!
Sunday, 26 February 2012
Friday, 10 February 2012
One love
Hate, war and competition can never lead the world toward love, peace and togetherness. Love, peace and togetherness consist of acceptance, collaboration, compassion, trust and truth.
If WE can...
- Accept others exactly as they are, whether they are like us or not
- Collaborate with others instead of competing against them
- Show compassion; remembering everyone has their own issues they're battling with
- Trust and be trustworthy
- Be honest and truthful
...in all our daily activities, then WE are the world leaders for love, peace and togetherness; one global community: one family: one love.
If WE can...
- Accept others exactly as they are, whether they are like us or not
- Collaborate with others instead of competing against them
- Show compassion; remembering everyone has their own issues they're battling with
- Trust and be trustworthy
- Be honest and truthful
...in all our daily activities, then WE are the world leaders for love, peace and togetherness; one global community: one family: one love.
Tuesday, 10 January 2012
Become one
Bleedin' Nora, could I ever wait for the power cut to cease so I can share this golden nugget with you..!!
Some of you may know that very occasionally I receive profound little messages during meditation. It's never while I'm thinking (I try really bloody hard not to!) and it's never about something which I've been previously considering - it just appears out of nowhere and leaves me a bit shocked. In a good way.
This morning's bolt from the blue told me: we are all here to learn, awaken, evolve, to a higher level of consciousness so that eventually we will all see what we're part of, which is one universal consciousness. The image in my head showed us moving upward to join a huge, white astral light which felt enormously joyous and contented, like finally coming home.
Then as I sat, taking this in, eyes wide open with shock, another wave explained further: when an individual stops evolving and awakening, they becomes sick and die, as they are no longer fulfilling their purpose for existence. They will then be transferred to a new existence in order to continue their journey toward universal consciousness.
I mean, WTF?! This is not something I consciously believe (particularly - I'm not sure what I believe) or have been thinking about AT ALL. It just came to me in images and then in words while I sat there trying not to think about how cold my hands were.
Later, still a little in shock so steadying my nerves with a packet of Spanish Tomato Tango Lays crisps (I needed the sugar) and warming my hands on a cuppa tea, it dawned on me that this is why we spend our lives yearning to belong - because fundamentally we do but most of us are just not aware of it yet.
Which brought strongly to mind, and added a whole new depth to the quote by Thich Nhat Hanh, "We are here to awaken from our illusion of separateness."
Some of you may know that very occasionally I receive profound little messages during meditation. It's never while I'm thinking (I try really bloody hard not to!) and it's never about something which I've been previously considering - it just appears out of nowhere and leaves me a bit shocked. In a good way.
This morning's bolt from the blue told me: we are all here to learn, awaken, evolve, to a higher level of consciousness so that eventually we will all see what we're part of, which is one universal consciousness. The image in my head showed us moving upward to join a huge, white astral light which felt enormously joyous and contented, like finally coming home.
Then as I sat, taking this in, eyes wide open with shock, another wave explained further: when an individual stops evolving and awakening, they becomes sick and die, as they are no longer fulfilling their purpose for existence. They will then be transferred to a new existence in order to continue their journey toward universal consciousness.
I mean, WTF?! This is not something I consciously believe (particularly - I'm not sure what I believe) or have been thinking about AT ALL. It just came to me in images and then in words while I sat there trying not to think about how cold my hands were.
Later, still a little in shock so steadying my nerves with a packet of Spanish Tomato Tango Lays crisps (I needed the sugar) and warming my hands on a cuppa tea, it dawned on me that this is why we spend our lives yearning to belong - because fundamentally we do but most of us are just not aware of it yet.
Which brought strongly to mind, and added a whole new depth to the quote by Thich Nhat Hanh, "We are here to awaken from our illusion of separateness."
Sunday, 8 January 2012
8 simple rules
Even though I quit the course at Kopan Monastery because I didn't get along with the teacher's style (!) I certainly wasn't ready to dismiss Buddhism in its entirety and so, after leaving the yoga ashram, I sat a three day Buddhism course at a small centre in Pokhara, and what an altogether different experience, and not only because I made it to the end. The monk-teacher was an "opinionated American" (thank you, Andy) as well as a critical thinker whose style really appealed to me and made me wish he'd taught the month-long course at Kopan as I might have enjoyed it, stayed and learnt something!
Anyway, my point is that, regardless of any bits of Buddhism I disagree with, it has some solid philosophies at its foundation that are useful tools to understanding happiness.
In Buddhism there's something called "The Four Noble Truths" and they go like this:
1) There is suffering
2) There are reasons for suffering
3) It's possible to make suffering stop
4) There's a path you can follow to make suffering stop.
Point four is made up of "the eightfold path" which is a list of tangible ways to stop suffering. It's a brilliant list and I don't doubt it works but I don't think it's exhaustive in itself and I feel it can be made more relevant and straight-forward for us regular people.
And that's why I'm in the East, doing courses, reading, meditating, thinking, talking to spiritual people, trying to get to the bottom of it so I can cut to the chase, write it in plain English and bring it home. (Did you know that, by the way? I'm not, as a paraglider I met recently suggested, "having a midlife crisis". Or if I am, I've been having one since I was nine.)
I've narrowed down my findings to a few main points, all of which I aim to explain in full in due course as, obviously, the "hows" are just as important as the "whats".
Meantime, for your perusal, here are the WHATS...
Firstly, there's a bunch of things we need to know. I'll call them "The Four Plain Truths":
1) The cause of our suffering is because of our untrained mind. The more we train the mind in the right way, the less we'll suffer.
2) Everything we do has an effect. Every action and interaction with a person, an animal, even an inanimate object has an effect both on ourself and them that can be positive, neutral or negative. We may not be here for a long time but what we do perpetuates and may stick around long after we've gone.
3) Pleasure is not true happiness. Pleasure is temporary, whereas true happiness is a deep, peaceful contentment that lasts.
4) Religion works as a technique, not just a belief system. We can't know for certain about past and future lives, ghosts and gods, etc. but that's not to say that all religion is bullshit. A lot of people have found true inner peace through following the rituals of religion but they don't have to believe or understand every word to do so; it can work just as effectively as a technique to attain lasting happiness (as long as we also follow "The Four Simple Instructions" - see below).
And then there's a bunch of things we need to do. Let's call them "The Four Simple Instructions":
1) Be kind to everyone and everything equally, INCLUDING OURSELF! Those of us with low self-worth need to work on it as negative thoughts and beliefs stop us from ever being at peace, and harm both us and those around us.
2) Be present in everything we do. When working, concentrate on working. When socialising, keep the mind right there with our friends. If we're with our family, don't let our thoughts wander off to something we did earlier or will be doing later.
3) Accept what we don't have control over, and that change is inevitable. When things are going well we hope it'll always be that way, and in difficult times we hope it'll pass. Nothing at all stays the same, things change, life moves on and the best way to handle that is to accept it as we sure as heck can't stop it.
4) Trust the universe and flow with life. Let go of "should" and "must", stop worrying about whether it'll make you rich or popular or whether it's scary or impractical, and follow the path of your heart.
Because of our conditioning (everything we've been told by our parents, teachers, peers and society from the day we were born) The Four Plain Truths can be hard to accept and The Four Simple Instructions can seem anything but easy, yet they ARE possible; the next level of my quest is to explain the HOWS...
Anyway, my point is that, regardless of any bits of Buddhism I disagree with, it has some solid philosophies at its foundation that are useful tools to understanding happiness.
In Buddhism there's something called "The Four Noble Truths" and they go like this:
1) There is suffering
2) There are reasons for suffering
3) It's possible to make suffering stop
4) There's a path you can follow to make suffering stop.
Point four is made up of "the eightfold path" which is a list of tangible ways to stop suffering. It's a brilliant list and I don't doubt it works but I don't think it's exhaustive in itself and I feel it can be made more relevant and straight-forward for us regular people.
And that's why I'm in the East, doing courses, reading, meditating, thinking, talking to spiritual people, trying to get to the bottom of it so I can cut to the chase, write it in plain English and bring it home. (Did you know that, by the way? I'm not, as a paraglider I met recently suggested, "having a midlife crisis". Or if I am, I've been having one since I was nine.)
I've narrowed down my findings to a few main points, all of which I aim to explain in full in due course as, obviously, the "hows" are just as important as the "whats".
Meantime, for your perusal, here are the WHATS...
Firstly, there's a bunch of things we need to know. I'll call them "The Four Plain Truths":
1) The cause of our suffering is because of our untrained mind. The more we train the mind in the right way, the less we'll suffer.
2) Everything we do has an effect. Every action and interaction with a person, an animal, even an inanimate object has an effect both on ourself and them that can be positive, neutral or negative. We may not be here for a long time but what we do perpetuates and may stick around long after we've gone.
3) Pleasure is not true happiness. Pleasure is temporary, whereas true happiness is a deep, peaceful contentment that lasts.
4) Religion works as a technique, not just a belief system. We can't know for certain about past and future lives, ghosts and gods, etc. but that's not to say that all religion is bullshit. A lot of people have found true inner peace through following the rituals of religion but they don't have to believe or understand every word to do so; it can work just as effectively as a technique to attain lasting happiness (as long as we also follow "The Four Simple Instructions" - see below).
And then there's a bunch of things we need to do. Let's call them "The Four Simple Instructions":
1) Be kind to everyone and everything equally, INCLUDING OURSELF! Those of us with low self-worth need to work on it as negative thoughts and beliefs stop us from ever being at peace, and harm both us and those around us.
2) Be present in everything we do. When working, concentrate on working. When socialising, keep the mind right there with our friends. If we're with our family, don't let our thoughts wander off to something we did earlier or will be doing later.
3) Accept what we don't have control over, and that change is inevitable. When things are going well we hope it'll always be that way, and in difficult times we hope it'll pass. Nothing at all stays the same, things change, life moves on and the best way to handle that is to accept it as we sure as heck can't stop it.
4) Trust the universe and flow with life. Let go of "should" and "must", stop worrying about whether it'll make you rich or popular or whether it's scary or impractical, and follow the path of your heart.
Because of our conditioning (everything we've been told by our parents, teachers, peers and society from the day we were born) The Four Plain Truths can be hard to accept and The Four Simple Instructions can seem anything but easy, yet they ARE possible; the next level of my quest is to explain the HOWS...
Friday, 23 December 2011
Yoga school drop-out (no graduation day for me)
It wasn't the most promising start. "Oh, dear," the landlady of the ashram looked up at me pityfully from the dietary requirements section of my registration form. "Veggan? That is how you say? No milk, no butter, no cream, no cheese, no egg, no honey," she read from my form. "Curd?" she tried, weakly. I shook my head. "Oh dear," she said again.
"I can't be the first," I began, in my defence. "Almost everyone I know who does yoga is vegan and this is an ashram..." She clasped her hands, shook her head and closed her eyes like I was delivering bad news about a relative. "We will think of something but breakfast real problem," she said solemnly. "Toast! I have my own peanut butter..." I blurted optimistically, as I followed her upstairs to my room.
"Do you use toilet paper?" she asked as I checked out the bathroom. "I'm sorry?" I questioned, sticking my head around the door. "Do you use toilet paper?" she repeated, nodding her head toward the squat toilet. "I'm not sure I understand. Toilet paper as opposed to what?" "Well, if you do, please put it in the bin and not in the toilet," she instructed, matter of factly, ignoring my question. "Do some people not use it?" I asked, genuinely confused. "We don't, we use water," the landlady shrugged. "But then you're all wet, you know, underneath. What do you dry with?" "We have a small cloth in the bathroom..." "I see," I nodded slowly, whilst making a mental note to never, ever use the hand towel in a Nepalese bathroom.
The morning yoga was a little too much pranayama (breathing exercises) for my liking and the evening yoga, although good, was conducted outside in an area surrounded by trees and therefore saw me constantly yanking down my sleeves and trouser legs, hoping to avoid mosquito bites - so I never really relaxed into it.
I just couldn't bring myself to join in with the neti cleansing conducted in the area I mentally referred to as "the snot garden". The less said about that the better. *shudder*
I came into myself for daily chanting, though. I was happy sitting in a circle, eyes closed, chanting musical mantras while some shook tambourines and bells and others banged drums. That was my favourite bit - music makes me feel connected.
The meditation needed mixing up a bit in my opinion. I know it's not meant to be interesting but it was the same technique twice a day which started to become monotonous. A bit of Osho style Bollywood dancing would've pleased me enormously but alas so-hum-ing with prayer beads were as much fun as we were allowed.
As all courses (lasting anything from one day to several weeks) begin on any day you fancy, every meal time consisted of the EXACT same conversation with the day's new faces: Where are you from? Where've you been? Where are you going next? How long are you staying? Have you been trekking/paragliding? After all that there was no time for deeper conversation and by day three I stopped wishing to communicate entirely, was very likely considered rude and moody (for which I actually didn't give a shit) and began resenting the fact that it wasn't a silent retreat.
It was a complete pain in the arse facing the daily barrage of questions about veganism when it was noticed I wasn't given the milky breakfast products but was instead presented with an apple and a banana and so I found myself either giving short answers like "everything else" when asked what I eat if not meat and dairy or worse still, saying I'm sick of the questions and don't want to talk about it. (It gets you that way when you're forced to talk about it three times a day.)
But the final straw came on the one day there was toast (halelujah!). Everyone was given cheese toasties and when I asked for plain toast got told there wasn't any bread left. Other than scowling at my apple and banana, I managed to internalise my tantrum, decided I'm not cut out for prison life, grabbed my rucksack and jar of peanut butter and sodded off down to Lakeside to find a drop-in yoga class. And some toast.
"I can't be the first," I began, in my defence. "Almost everyone I know who does yoga is vegan and this is an ashram..." She clasped her hands, shook her head and closed her eyes like I was delivering bad news about a relative. "We will think of something but breakfast real problem," she said solemnly. "Toast! I have my own peanut butter..." I blurted optimistically, as I followed her upstairs to my room.
"Do you use toilet paper?" she asked as I checked out the bathroom. "I'm sorry?" I questioned, sticking my head around the door. "Do you use toilet paper?" she repeated, nodding her head toward the squat toilet. "I'm not sure I understand. Toilet paper as opposed to what?" "Well, if you do, please put it in the bin and not in the toilet," she instructed, matter of factly, ignoring my question. "Do some people not use it?" I asked, genuinely confused. "We don't, we use water," the landlady shrugged. "But then you're all wet, you know, underneath. What do you dry with?" "We have a small cloth in the bathroom..." "I see," I nodded slowly, whilst making a mental note to never, ever use the hand towel in a Nepalese bathroom.
The morning yoga was a little too much pranayama (breathing exercises) for my liking and the evening yoga, although good, was conducted outside in an area surrounded by trees and therefore saw me constantly yanking down my sleeves and trouser legs, hoping to avoid mosquito bites - so I never really relaxed into it.
I just couldn't bring myself to join in with the neti cleansing conducted in the area I mentally referred to as "the snot garden". The less said about that the better. *shudder*
I came into myself for daily chanting, though. I was happy sitting in a circle, eyes closed, chanting musical mantras while some shook tambourines and bells and others banged drums. That was my favourite bit - music makes me feel connected.
The meditation needed mixing up a bit in my opinion. I know it's not meant to be interesting but it was the same technique twice a day which started to become monotonous. A bit of Osho style Bollywood dancing would've pleased me enormously but alas so-hum-ing with prayer beads were as much fun as we were allowed.
As all courses (lasting anything from one day to several weeks) begin on any day you fancy, every meal time consisted of the EXACT same conversation with the day's new faces: Where are you from? Where've you been? Where are you going next? How long are you staying? Have you been trekking/paragliding? After all that there was no time for deeper conversation and by day three I stopped wishing to communicate entirely, was very likely considered rude and moody (for which I actually didn't give a shit) and began resenting the fact that it wasn't a silent retreat.
It was a complete pain in the arse facing the daily barrage of questions about veganism when it was noticed I wasn't given the milky breakfast products but was instead presented with an apple and a banana and so I found myself either giving short answers like "everything else" when asked what I eat if not meat and dairy or worse still, saying I'm sick of the questions and don't want to talk about it. (It gets you that way when you're forced to talk about it three times a day.)
But the final straw came on the one day there was toast (halelujah!). Everyone was given cheese toasties and when I asked for plain toast got told there wasn't any bread left. Other than scowling at my apple and banana, I managed to internalise my tantrum, decided I'm not cut out for prison life, grabbed my rucksack and jar of peanut butter and sodded off down to Lakeside to find a drop-in yoga class. And some toast.
Sunday, 11 December 2011
Tea and simplicity
Patient: "Doctor, doctor, every time I drink tea I get a sharp pain in my eye."
Doctor: "Have you tried removing the spoon?"
(It'd be unsurprising to learn that the doctor prescribed painkillers but that's another discussion.)
It can take a different perspective to see that something as obvious as removing the spoon - generally not considered harmful to health! - from our cup of tea can save us unnecessary pain. And it's an alternative to mainstream Western culture that will offer the path to a life of less suffering.
If you're wondering, "What's missing?" it's doubtful you'll find the answer. Instead, turn the question on its head and ask, "What's surplus?" It's much more likely pondering this question will point you toward the right path.
Doctor: "Have you tried removing the spoon?"
(It'd be unsurprising to learn that the doctor prescribed painkillers but that's another discussion.)
It can take a different perspective to see that something as obvious as removing the spoon - generally not considered harmful to health! - from our cup of tea can save us unnecessary pain. And it's an alternative to mainstream Western culture that will offer the path to a life of less suffering.
If you're wondering, "What's missing?" it's doubtful you'll find the answer. Instead, turn the question on its head and ask, "What's surplus?" It's much more likely pondering this question will point you toward the right path.
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